Dreaming About Tallinn

The study abroad group went on our final trip this past weekend. Stop number one was Tallinn, Estonia.

The trip to Tallinn consisted of an all-night bus ride. The first few hours were okay as it included things like Allison's anti-rain dance. The weather report showed rain but thanks to her sheer willpower and anti-rain moves we enjoyed beautiful weather. However, I will be okay if I never spend the night on a bus again.

Our day and a half in Estonia's capital started with the most delicious breakfast at a nice hotel. After that, the rest of the morning and afternoon was simply exploring the city. The city is very much medieval in feel and even more so for us as we stayed in older part of town. Castles, stone walls, cobblestone streets, and people selling sweet almonds come together for a city of living history. The thing that stuck out the most was the doors. Tallinn has the most interesting doors and they are everywhere. Different colors, patterns, and carvings. Dinner that night was the longest dinner I have ever eaten. We spent three solid hours eating a dinner of multiple courses. The plus side to drawing it out so long is that no one felt stuffed despite the amount of food everyone consumed and we were offered alot! The restaurant catered to the medieval-ness of the city, we only had candles for light and everything was themed. After dinner we were able to walk around some more and experience the city at night. I went with some girls to different look out points and enjoyed the lights of the town.

Day two of Tallinn was spent mostly in an indoor water park for most of the group, including myself. I had forgotten how much I enjoyed swimming. After swimming, sliding, sauna-ing, and showering (oh, the joys of alliteration) I enjoyed my last hour in Tallinn sipping cappuccinos in an outdoor cafe with wonderful companions. It is hard to fully articulate the beauty and wonder of Tallinn. I have pretty much fallen in love with it in the short amount of time we spent there. It now holds a special part of my heart along with cities like San Diego (my all time favorite city), Klaipeda, and San Francisco.

Alas, our time came to a close as we went farther up and father in (or south for those who don't get the c.s. lewis reference) towards Riga...

Dreaming About Spring, Sun, and Swans.

Oh, spring. It's a beautiful thing and it is here in full force. The warm weather is causing extreme happiness and utter dismay as I consider 55F warm weather. My mother laughed as she today as she reminded me to look forward to high 80's the moment I landed and the temp was just going to go up from there. For the girl who always has crazy cold hands I have acclimated to this weather amazingly well.

The sun is different here. I may have mentioned this already but the sun amazes me. In California the sun equals warmth. Here, the sun mostly equals light. It is starting to become warmer as I said but you stand in the sun and you aren't drenched in heat like you are back in CA.

Swans. They live on the pond. They are mean. They chased me yesterday. Swans.

One last thought before I head off to a weekend in Riga, Latvia and Tallinn, Estonia. Good cheese comes from happy cows, happy cows come from California. Lithuanian cows must be blissful.

Dreaming About the Russian Breakdown: Part 2

There's a rumor in St. Petersburg. Oh, how many times our group repeated and sang the song from the animated movie Anastasia we grew up watching. Her and her family are all over St. Petersburg, by the way. They family have become saints in the Russian Orthodox Church and are therefore icons as well as historical figures. Ergo, their pictures are everywhere.

I enjoyed St. Petersburg much better than Moscow. It was warmer, closer together, walkable, and had a much more calm feel than Moscow. Our hostel was located right in the center of everything which made it wonderful! Our four days in the city were filled with adventure but felt very paced out and do-able.

Day one saw us on a 5 hour walking tour with the best tour guide. She continually had us in and out so we were able to warm up in-between jaunts around the city. We got to hear random stories and weird history. Example: Lots of young Russian couples like to get married in a certain beautiful park during the summer, the park is a mass grave from the 1,000 day siege of WWII. Romantic. That night we dressed up and headed off to the Russian Ballet in a beautiful theater.

Over the next three days we saw more museums, cathedrals, and went to a great show called Feel Yourself Russian which featured traditional folk dances, songs, and incredibly talented performers. Three of the boys in our group were chosen to dance with three of the girls during the audience participation dance. Three particular visits from those three days stand out.

The first would be the Hermitage. Started by Catherine the Great (I think), it is the second biggest art collection in the world. Formerly the largest, approximately 1/3 of the collection was sold off by the Soviet Union for money to fund the regime. The Russian government is working on restoring the collection but success has been limited. It is a beautiful gallery across the street from the winter palace as it was originally a private collection for the royal family. There were ball rooms, throne rooms, ad great halls. I have now seen original works by Monet, Picasso, and Rembrandt, among others. My favorite part was the great hall used for balls. It was like a scene out of a movie, I could see the great ladies and gentlemen twirling to the music. Royalty is easier to image when you are standing in their party room.

The second would be the Church of Our Savior On the Spilt Blood. The cathedral, which was funded almost entirely by peasant donation, stands on the assassination spot of Alexander II (the our savior standing on his spilt blood), the Tsar who freed the surfs from their servitude. The nobles, losing their slaves, where determined to murder the Tsar and after eight failed assassination attempts, they were successful. The inside of the church is entirely mosaic; walls, ceilings, pillars, everything. It took 24 years to complete the original work. During WWII the church was bombed, miraculously, the ammunition lodged in the rafters but never detonated. It remained there until the 1970's. Stalin wanted to explode the church himself because the building is a testament to a Tsar but because of the church's location, right next to the canal, it would cost too much to repair the canal from an explosion. It was saved for a second time. In 1970 the value of the church was again seen and restoration began. Restoration took 27 years and the church was re-opened as a museum in 1997.

My final awe-inspiring moment came from attending an orthodox service. I love worshipping God in ways that open my eyes to how big and powerful He really is. Coming from a Protestant background, I am well versed in God as my friend. I walk around church barefoot and sit on a comfortable chair during service. That is not wrong, it is an aspect of God's character. But we sometimes miss the holiness of God. Orthodox cathedrals are ornate and beautiful because it is God's dwelling, there are no chairs because it is unthinkable that a human sit in the presence of their God. God is Holy, God is powerful, God is real. I could go on but I feel it would turn into more of a preachy rant than it already becoming so I will leave it at this: it was beautiful.

We boarded an overnight train back to Latvia and rode a bus back to home sweet home in Klaipeda. Mexico and Florida have nothing on Russia... except maybe some sun.

Coolest Spring Break Ever.

Dreaming About the Russian Breakdown: Part 1

Russia. The land of fur hats and dancing bears in the streets. Words come to mind like ballet, circus, Tsars, revolution, Lenin, Orthodox cathedrals, Anastasia. I've been there. Wow.

The Russian adventure should start with the final departure meeting the Wednesday before we left. I was not the only person surprised that we were actually staying in Godzilla hostel in Moscow. We were given a great 20 min Emas story about how we should not lose our passports but if we do Emas can get us out of it like the time he was in China and a girl lost her passport and... Well, it was entertaining but I'll save you the details. We were also briefed on what to take, what not to take, our itinerary, and our comrade groups. I was in Maksat's group which consisted of Rheanna, Kirk, Brittany, Melanie, Kelly, Mango, and myself. It's okay if those names mean nothing to you, they mean something to me.

Saturday morning saw us all up early and ready to go... except for Kelly who ended up being the token sleep-in girl being pulled out of bed as everyone waits on the bus. Day one was all travel except for a short break at the Hill of Crosses. The description is in the name. It is a hill filled with approximately one million crosses and I believe that number. There are crosses on crosses on crosses. One cross may hold 100 rosaries on it. Huge crosses and tiny crosses. Crosses with Lithuania, Russian, Japanese, English, Spanish. Wood, metal, plastic, stone. It is a sight to behold and it was amazing. It was also freezing which kept our stay to a minimum and then back to the bus. In Riga, Latvia we caught the overnight train to Moscow. The train ride was mainly uneventful except for the border crossing when a Russian border guard decided she was going to start stroking my hair and then made a joke about cutting it all off. I, however, did not find it amusing, to say the least. To be fair, I do have odd hair compared to the general public. Straight hair is everywhere and mine is clearly not.

Our three day in Moscow can be summed up in four words: Metro, Escalators, Red Square. A nice fifth word would be FREEZING!! I have never been so cold in my life, 20 min outside and you were so cold you lips were numb. Talking with numb lips is an odd experience I would rather not repeat... ever. On to the positives; the metro system is beautiful. It's like they put a subway system in an art gallery. It is also complicated as anything and there are escalators everywhere. Because the city is so big and spread out we were in the metro alot.

Red Square is not what I expected, it is much bigger for one thing. I also didn't expect to see actors dressed up as Lenin and Stalin taking pictures with people and a giant Sponge Bob Square Pants (yes, I couldn't believe it either) in the center of the outside square. Currently, there is an ice rink in the center but that is of little consequence. Starting in a circle you have one of the most beautiful and expensive malls in the world (we walked into one shop to find a $200 scarf). Then you have St. Basil's which, in my opinion, is much more amazing on the outside. Moving on we have Lenin's tomb, walking through was the most creepy thing I have ever done. And finally, a museum that looks like a cathedral.

Other than Red Square, we also went to the circus, took a walking tour, saw lots of cathedrals, ate (the food in Russia is delicious), went to a modern art museum, and walked alot. The 2 1/2 days we spent there passed quickly enough and then onward we went to St. Petersburg...

Dreaming About 1 Month and 1 Day

Okay, so I've been away for a while... a loooong while. 2 months to be exact. Sorry about that. Life got mundane and then life got busy and before you know it you are looking at April 1st wondering where the time went.

Here is my plan. I have exactly 1 month and 1 day left before I get on a plane and fly home. I plan to write at least every other day in that time save for next weekend when I will be computer-less for a few days in a row. I will start tomorrow with part one of the Russia break down and see where it goes from there. 31 days and a minimum of 16 posts is all I have left...

Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your life.

Dreaming About Directions

Today, I got lost in Lithuania. It's a miracle it took me this long to truly get lost. I mean, a few weeks ago (it's crazy that it was a few weeks ago) I took the wrong bus and ended up a stop away from school but I knew exactly where I was and it only took me 10min to get back to school. But today, I was truly and utterly lost. Don't worry though, I was not alone.

As today was the first of the month we all received our beloved stipends and my friend Brittany and I decided to go to Maxima (think Wal-mart+ grocery store) for some much needed groceries and assorted items. Instead of getting on the 3 bus like we always do (the routes changed this week) we waited for a different bus and hopped on the 14 (I think, it may have been the 17) and set off. Through town all was good but then the bus turned left when it was supposed to go straight. Brittany and I decided the best course of action was to hop off at the next stop and try to find our way back and just walk the rest of the way. So, we hopped off at the next stop and started walking in the direction we thought we were supposed to be going. About 45min later of walking towards what we prayed was Akropolis the blessed neon appeared in the distance! So, I supposed we weren't utterly lost. I mean, we had no idea where we were and only a small idea of where we were supposed to be headed but it could have been much, much worse. We both bought enough food to restock our cupboards and then headed home on the right bus.

Adventure, check!

Holding my title as the queen of getting lost, check!

Food, check!

Dreaming About Productive Sundays

I had a productive Sunday. It was wonderful! I got up at a decent hour and met up with a fellow classmate at the computer labs to work on a project that was due. We were finished by noon, which allowed me to eat a tasty lunch while watching a tv show on my computer (yay for streaming). After that I did some homework until 2pm.

That’s when the real fun started. I went with a group to a local orphanage about 10min walk away. We spent about 2 hours playing games. The children were a little varied in age, the youngest was about 4 and the oldest, 14. We played games like Mingle Mingle, Sharks and Minnows, and Simon Says. After that some of the group played basketball with the older boys. I played with two of the younger boys who loved my camera. We had plenty of photo shoots and movies until the battery died on us. They then moved on the next camera (how fast popularity comes and goes –sigh-). The best thing about my afternoon at the orphanage? I don’t speak or understand Russian or Lithuania. I had no idea what anybody said and I couldn’t say anything that would be understood by anyone but the LCC students. Verbal communication was lost to me and I appreciated that. Sure, it would have been way more convenient but to lose it forced us to communicate on a different level. One of the little boys I played with had learned to count to 10 in English. When I was his age I was learning to count to 10 in Spanish and I thought I was the coolest person because I knew two languages. We connected through a shared experience. Games and fun are a language all of its own. I remembered that language today.

Right after the orphanage I got to go to church. Not a church, not my church, but church. Catholic church in the definition of the words rather than the denomination denoted to them. I hung out with my universal family of believers. Can you say amazing? The church is English speaking and made up of mostly LCC professors and their families, and students. We meet in the upstairs of the Salvation Army. Random fact time; the buildings here are so crazy beautiful that the Salvation Army building (aka, not the best in town) has marble stairs, marble! Worshiping was refreshing in a way I hardly describe. Afterwards, we shared a meal of incredible proportions. Sloppy Joes! I never before realized how much I love American food!

As if that day were not amazing enough already when I came home I got to skpe my kids at APC! Seeing their faces was the sprinkles, fudge, and cherry on my brilliant Sunday! If only everyday could be Sunday...

Dreaming About a Big Mac

I went to McDonalds on Saturday. I know, I know, I went halfway around the world to eat at McDonalds. A restaurant (if you can call it that) that I don’t even eat at when I am home. Not really sure if that makes it better or worse.

However, I promised my little brother, Joey, that I would eat at least once at a McDonalds. Random fact time; there are two in Klaipeda and there were five in Vilnius, although we didn’t eat at any there. I will find out how many there are in Russia when I embark on that trip in March and I hear that they also have Burger King!

However wrong it may be to eat at an American restaurant while in Lithuania I can almost guarantee that I will return. I loved that hamburger and fries so much more than I normally would. For one, the food is better here because the ingredients are slightly different and also, I am missing American food. We got Sloppy Joes on Sunday after church and all the study abroad students where in food heaven. In a way, I am missing the United States. Don’t get me wrong, I am so happy here and nowhere near ready to leave. I doubt whether I will be ready to leave in May. That aside, the US is my home.

Certain people I know and have met in the past few years have tried to make me feel guilty that the US is my home. It’s almost as if I can’t be proud of the fact that I grew up in America as opposed to abroad and I can’t claim the US as my country with happiness. I am a Californian, I was born and raised in California and it is my home. I don’t need to feel guilty about my home. Sure, it may not sound as cool as some other country but it is mine. My roommate was talking to me tonight about why I like it here in the hopes she would like it more. I asked her why she didn’t like it and she said it was because it wasn’t home (she is Latvian). Walking into that McDonalds gave me a 20min escape to home. I was surrounded by familiar smells (fries, mmm) and familiar sights.

I plan to live abroad in the future (how far in the future is still up for debate, I think it will be a long while still). Currently, the destination on my heart is England but we will see where God plants me (Eastern Europe is definitely growing on me). When I get there it won’t matter how long I am gone, the US will always be my home, it will always be a part of me. I am more than okay with that. I am proud of that. I am an American.

Dreaming About Old Habits

I slept through my alarm this morning. It took me less than a week of classes to fail to wake up after the dreaded beeping. I immediately fell into a dream justifying why I could sleep through class. Apparently, in the class we were going to learn how to boil water so if you were already familiar with that skill you had permission to skip class. Fortunately for me, my brain was awake enough to reason that that couldn't be the case and I awoke with a start with 20 min to dress and hurry to class.

Why am I choosing to tell you this? It reminded me of something I needed reminding of; I am still me. I have all my same bad habits and weird quirks. All the same fears and strengths. I am still the girl with weird dreams who sleeps through her alarm most mornings. I came to Lithuania and somewhere deep inside I think I believed that if I just went somewhere else I could be someone else, the person I thought I should be. But that's not ever true, is it?

I am currently sitting at my desk on the sixth floor looking through my huge window at a gorgeous scene. There is snow everywhere and the sky is clear of clouds. The sun has just dipped beneath the horizon but traces of sweeping pink, yellow, green, and blue linger behind hazy outlines of buildings and trees as lights begin to illuminate the streets and windows. It's breathtaking. It's where I am, but it says nothing about me. It doesn't define me or do anything to me.

Sure, I am in a new place. And yes, I want to grow and change and learn here. But just being here won't do that for me. It requires something of me. Otherwise, I will come home the exact same person who left and I don't see that as a good thing. Likewise, I don't think it would be healthy to come home a completely different person either. But if I don't grow, then my time here would be wasted. It would be wasted no matter where I was because life is a growing process and it doesn't stop unless we make it stop by becoming complacent. I don't want to ever get to the point where I am complacent. Growing can hurt, I have learned this in excruciating detail during the past few years. Despite that, we continue to choose to grow. Because the outcome is worth the pain. Because the masterpiece emerges from the mess.

Peace.

Dreaming About Classes

Well, I am three days into class. I would say that is an official start to the semester, yes? As of currently I think I am going to like them all although I have yet to pick a favorite (or least favorite). The final list is as follows:

MWF: Youth Ministry (excited to see the European aspects), Cross Culture (study abroad class only on Monday), C.S. Lewis (I love him, the man is brilliant).

T/TH: History of Translation (interesting), Digital Photography (fun), The English Bible as Literature (I think I have an advantage considering the English Bible is the only one I know).

Life is beginning to fall into a routine here. I have a 8:30am class every day which means that until the end of the month I will be waking up in the dark and walking to class before the sun peeks over the horizon. The days are currently short, about 7-8 hours of light, but no worries as we gain 4 min of daylight every day (twice as fast as CA) so by the time I leave there will be well over 12 hours of daylight each day. J

I have got the bus system figured out well enough that I can find my way to places and even took it by myself today! A huge accomplishment for me considering I am brilliant at getting lost. While some people make a big deal about public transportation it is really not weird for me. I will definitely miss my car but I think I will miss driving more than the convenience of having a car. I enjoy walking (even in the cold) and I am actually enjoying public transportation. As for the cold, I am acclimating really well and it has warmed up a bit since we got here. It has been in the high 20’s most days and the sun is starting to shine more, and when the sun shines, it is BRIGHT!

My room is a still a learning process. I won’t pretend it isn’t hard to have roommates who speak mostly Russian while in the room, sometimes I feel left out but I keep telling myself that they aren’t talking about me or ignoring me but for a room of four people I sometimes feel very alone. Last night was fun, my roommate and I watched Sense and Sensibility together as the power went on and off. 10 times. We are up to 4 outages today. The story is that someone (probably an American) has something unconverted plugged in and keeps blowing out the entire building. It’s annoying. There was even a rumor that someone had a tanning bed in their room, I found that one hard to believe. How would you fit one of those?? Oh, best thing about the rooms: the towel warmer in the shower room. Sometimes, I just like to warm up my cold hands on it, it is so nice.

One last note for everyone who said I would meet a boy. It is true, his name is Isak and he is adorable. We spent four hours together today. Unfortunately for those same people, he is only 7 months old and part of our time included me changing his diaper but I am sold. He is the son of the VP of student life and I am sure there will be more on him later as our relationship progresses.

Peace.

Dreaming About My New Home

I have a new home in Klaipeda, Lithuania. It is E602 in Neumann Hall. Which, incidentally, is the only hall. Furthermore, it is one of only three buildings that make up my school. For those of us, myself included, who thought that APU was a small school, the entire university here is only 2/3 the size of my class back home. 600 people. 25 who are Studying Abroad from Universities in the States.

Today was LCC 101. We took a tour of the campus (that only took about 30min), had a meeting with the President and some other important people, set up our email accounts, added each other on facebook, and then learned some important Lithuanian phrases and talked about culture shock. Then we hit the mall. :)

My roommates haven't shown up yet, they should be getting back from break in a few days. I have three just like at home. The rooms are a bit different. They are like a hybrid of a dorm room and an apartment. Best part; the bar in the shower that is always hot. It is for warming towels but I just like putting my hands on it.

There were only fake princes and princesses at the castle we went to but it was pretty amazing all the same. The castle was on an island surrounded by a frozen lake and there was a moat and a drawbridge and everything. Very middle ages, which was when it was originally built. The walls looked very interesting because the castle was mostly destroyed in a war and you can see exactly where it was rebuilt because the stones suddenly become very straight and neat. It kind of made me want to live in a castle. Especially since they had added heat so it was very warm inside.

Peace.

Dreaming About Day One

Today was my first day in Lithuania. Technically my second day but considering I only spent about half an hour on my true day one, we will call this day one. I arrived in Vilnus, Lithuania after a 44 hour trip in which I ended up stuck in Germany for about 7 hours, sent to Poland (not on the original itinerary) where my fourth flight was delayed (again!!) and finally landed about 12 hours after I was originally set to arrive. Lucky for me everyone already knew my name thanks to my lovely Rheanna, who, knowing I when I was originally set to arrive, apparently kept asking when I was going to come. The staff picking me up where very amused to meet me.

After all three hostel roommates sleeping through the alarm and causing us to be late we set out on our first day. Morning consisted of breakfast in a cafe, a visit to a KGB prison that was in use in my lifetime (it closed after the USSR collapsed in '91), and a trip to the US embassy (yes Mom, they do have an embassy here) where we met the ambassador. By this time, despite the fact that I was sure my trip had messed me up so much I wouldn't have jet lag, I was exhausted. Right now it almost midnight here but amazingly I am no longer tired (go figure). However, we set out on a walking tour of the city with a wonderful guide in the freezing weather, and finally had dinner at a beautiful restaurant.

Some brief Lithuanian history for you: It is the oldest country (1,000 years) with the oldest living language, it was the last European country to convert from paganism in the 14th century, it used to be 30% Jewish but the Nazis killed over 90% of the Jewish population in WWII, the synagogue count pre WWII in Vilnus was over 100, today there is only 1, there are 43 churches in Vilnus with 30 still in use (and they are beautiful).

My biggest impressions thus far:

1. It is COLD (no way to get around it, it's -7 C or 19F outside).

2. The architecture is BEAUTIFUL (one of the biggest things I was looking forward to).

3. It smells funny (not necessary bad, except for the bus which smells like cigarettes, gross).

4. Business play English music (most random song of the day, the theme song to Married With Children).

Tomorrow is our last day in the capital, we are shopping in the morning and then taking the bus to Kaipeda tomorrow, which is where the school is located. On the way we are stopping at a castle! According to one of our guides it has real princes and princesses running around... and a dragon... and Star Wars... but I'm not sure if he was telling the truth or not. :)

Well, off to try to sleep and dream of princes and dragons.

Peace.

Dreaming Up A New Year

It's January 1st, 2010. On the first day of the new year I am dreaming of a new adventure. 3 days from now I will be on a plane flying to the country of Lithuania for my study abroad adventure. I get to go with one amazing friend and roommate and will spend 4 months having the semester of a lifetime at Lithuania Christian College (or LCC). It will be my first time outside of the country (except for Mexico but I'm still not sure I count those trips since I never really left California, it just had a Baja in front of it). Nevertheless, I will be flying over the Atlantic with a total travel time of 24 hours (not including my 6 hours of layover time) to arrive in Lithuania at 1:45pm on January 5, 2010 (4:45am California time).

The other day I was thinking about what I wanted to happen in the next 16 weeks of my life. I had quite a list. Some things on it were:

I want to be strong... I want to be outgoing... I want to be happy... I want to take full advantage of where I am... I want to be present... I want to find the part of me still missing... I want to learn... I want to teach... I want to grow... I want to see God in a new way... I want...

And then a very familiar verse came into my head. Now, I must admit that, while I work in a church and love ministry, I find it cheesy to quote verses all the time (I'm not sure why this is as I live my life quoting movies, songs, books, and even certain youtube videos) but in this case I am going to share my verse, in KVJ no less (I blame 13 years of awana for the old school translation).

Luke 12:31 - But rather seek ye the kingdom of God; and all these things shall be added unto you.

So, instead of more goals than I can count, I narrowed it down to one (and a half but that comes later). I want to seek God's kingdom. Where I am, in what I am doing. For the next three days I want to seek God's kingdom in the United States. For the following months, I want to seek God's kingdom in Lithuania, Russia, and wherever else I may find myself.

And here comes the half. I want to be immersed and invested in my Lithuania adventure. So immersed that I dream, at least one dream, in Lithuanian (whether or not I will understand what is being said in that dream is up for debate).